Broken.

I wrote this in October, after getting back into a relationship I knew I shouldn't get back into...only to have it end it heartache. I was charmed back in once again...and it all came crashing down on me yesterday. The moral - follow God and follow your instincts... The mending process begins again.

The chilly fall wind outside seems to have made its way inside my body to the cold exterior layer of my heart. A heart that had finally allowed itself to open completely to a love I just knew was true and everlasting. A heart that listened intently to the charming, convincing words of a man who in the end, was not at all the man he portrayed himself to be. I have given my heart to God, instead of trying to mend the pieces myself. I know the ice will melt, and my heart will heal. Only then will I ask God to help me open myself up once again to the love and the future He has especially for me. Until that day, I will pray for grace and strength and focus on the overwhelming positives He has already given me.

Let It Go.

I stole this from my friend Ashley's blog. So very true. The only people you need in your life are the people who have shown they need you in theirs.

If you are holding on to something that doesn't belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to........LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains ......LET IT GO!!!

If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and see your worth.....LET IT GO!!!

If someone has angered you ........LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge......LET IT GO!!!

If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction.....LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents....LET IT GO!!!

If you have a bad attitude.........LET IT GO!!!

If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better......LET IT GO!!!

If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in Him......LET IT GO!!!

If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship.......LET IT GO!!!

If you keep trying to help someone who won't even try to help themselves.....LET IT GO!!!

If you're feeling depressed and stressed .........LET IT GO!!!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling yourself and God is saying "take your hands off of it," then you need to......LET IT GO!!!

Let the past be the past. Forget the former things. "The Battle is the Lord's!"

Comfort

I'm in awe of the quote below...and have been in deep thought about it since my friend Jackie posted it on my Myspace page yesterday. This is truly, truly what I want...

Oh, the comfort - the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person - having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away.

~Dinah Craik, A Life for a Life, 1859

Safety and Security

What I need most and what I crave most in a relationship is safety and security. A friend told me the following while we were talking about relationships this week...and it really hit home. Very insightful.

"You need to feel safe in a relationship. To me, that comes from knowing you mean more to the other person than anyone else and that they will do everything they can to make you happy. Only then are you totally secure."

New York - Mom & Daughter Trip!

Mom and I had always wanted to travel to New York City, so that's exactly what we did! :) For my 31st birthday (ugh!), she set up an amazing trip and we had such a wonderful time!

We were able to see the Empire State Building...

...the musical Rent (I was dying to be on stage!)...

...and my favorite, the Staten Island Ferry!

But after a few days in record-breaking 100 degree weather + humidity...it was time to go!!

So handsome!

I just absolutely love this picture and had to share! :)

Eli - The Athlete!

Eli is officially finished with his first season of t-ball and soccer. Crazy us, we decided to sign him up for both sports at the same time...just to see which one he liked best! After shuttling the little guy between soccer practice, t-ball practice, soccer games, t-ball games, soccer pictures and t-ball pictures...we weren't all that upset to hear that he'd rather not play soccer next time. It WAS entertaining, though, to watch him try to stay as FAR AWAY from the soccer ball as possible. If that meant waiting for all of his other teammates to run by him in order to get to the back of the pack, that's exactly what he did! :)

T-ball was more his speed, but as you can see, he's the SMALLEST one out there! There was two Eli's on his team (so much for picking a unique name...) and he was "Little Eli." I certainly hope he grows soon! ;)